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A change in opinion or actions does not make one a hypocrite.
Definition: hypocrisy |hiˈpäkrisē| noun ( pl. -sies) the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.
Thesaurus: hypocrite noun dissembler, deceiver, liar, pietist, sanctimonious person, plaster saint; informal phony, fraud, sham, fake.Current Music: The Arcade Fire - (Antichrist Television Blues) |
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This is my first update since September 2006. There isn't much to say. This picture is pretty beautiful though, I think. Do you? It's amazing what light can do on a digital sensor. Spectacular! Current Mood: ok Current Music: TV On The Radio - The Wrong Way |
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Hello!
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Sep. 28th, 2006 @ 07:19 pm
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Is anybody out there?Current Music: Beach House |
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Last night I saw "Peep 'TV' Show" by director Yutaka Tsuchiya at Facets with Barbara and Isaac. It is a movie about loneliness, voyeurism, and the general futility of life in a post 9-11 Tokyo. The main characters build their walls online, wasting away their lifes watching others, oblivious to the idea that they are no more interesting than the people they so interestedly watch on the internet.
It was an interesting movie that had unexpectedly great dialogue and a unique interpretation of the "REAL." Though these themes are often expressed in postmodern art, film and literature alike, it was refreshing to see the topic explored from a Japanese perspective. At one point a character realizes that they are, "in the same boat as [America]." The character realizes that Japan, as a world power, is no more innocent than the United States when it comes to taking advantage of smaller nations and repressing certain freedoms around the world.
After the movie, the three of us stopped by the bar down the street from Barbara's apartment and had a few too many drinks. It was fun though and I got the DJ to play some Kanye West for us, though I wanted to hear Violent Femmes' "36-24-36," he didn't have that, so West had to be settled for.
We had some good conversation throughout the night and I got some fun pictures.
After dropping them both off at their respective homes, I met Meagan and her friend from work at The Black Beatle on Chicago and had yet another beer. After that, I was done for!
Got into a small argument about the validities of being open to art and the unnecessary act of being very specific in what one finds value in. There is redemption to be found in all art, no matter how childesh or vainly ignorant it is of the contemporary or historical art world. I've found that no matter what the piece, no matter what the medium, there will always be someone out there to appreciate it. And this appreciation is the art's justification. Hell, no one even needs to appreciate it, the justification is the art itself. In the words of Gautier, "l'art pour l'art." Art must not always have a purpose. Oscar Wilde went so far to declare, "all art is useless."
Some art, such as performance art doesn't even have a record of it's occurance unless it's a written or photographic documentation of the event, both of which are ultimately weak substitutes for reality and the experience of being there for the art.
So what is it that i really enjoy? Life and living. Being in the world, in existence. Becoming is my art, wherever it may take me.Current Music: Bob Dylan - Blonde on Blonde |
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Sitting on the yellow couch, immune - for now - to the cat's infiltrating dander and dust. On my back, my head propped up by a stiff red pillow.
(Cozy and warm)
I've been thinking of the friends I don't see. Me. I'm so anti-social
when I can't be around me and myself. A lonely party with no expectations.
Home - A lonely march to the couch
Or to the chair cast in bluish glow.
But (Did you hear the frightened ones?)
No escape from my friends. I keep them close, even it appears I'm alone.
If you find yourself alone, missing me, know that I struggle to see the (Blue sky) ahead of you, before you. Yes, before.
When I get there first and see it alone I think, "All that space and singularity seen by only me?" Surely notions of a selfish man, don't you think?
I'm not too sure. Life can be much loneliness.
(Watch out)Current Music: Pink Floyd - The Wall (Vinyl) |
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I received a much greater response to my lonely livejournal post than I had expected.
Thanks everyone.
I'm amazed that you all use LJ so often after all this time. I didn't think it was still a major form of communication on the internet, what with MySpace and everything.
For me, MySpace is much better. You can do Blogging on it as well. I don't think there is anything you can do on here than on MySpace. Except the nice way the friends page is setup here, with all your friend's blog's listed chronologically, I see no reason to stick around.
Perhaps I'll just have to add LJ to the already growing list of sites to update as a single blog.
It'll be worth it if I know this many of you are reading.
Some other sites of mine:
http://aphony.blogspot.com/
http://www.myspace.com/aphony
http://blog.myspace.com/aphony/
And a Columbia College Online Magazine I'm an editor for:
http://www.colum.edu/students/reservoir/index.htm
Jan. 18th, 2006 @ 04:23 pm
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| » Hi |
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No one probably comes here anymore, except a creep I know.
If you do, say Hi. Cause here I am, saying hi to you good sirs and misses.
Jan. 17th, 2006 @ 02:29 am
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| » Ummm... |
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Usual shit. Nothing to say, nothing to do... but waste time. It's always moving, pushing things further than they should be allowed to go. Spiraling through great expanses of time. Distancing you from me (but bringing us closer in some supernatural way that I can't even describe).
So what do I do now? Keep moving? Lay still? Hide in the shadows? Run naked (emotionally, you pervert) in the sun?
Choices are difficult.
I just want somebody to save me.
Jul. 10th, 2005 @ 10:55 pm
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| » Hello Everyone |
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I haven't posted in a while. How's everyone doing?
Jun. 18th, 2005 @ 01:12 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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yes, finally, a post. sorry i've been so negligent of you. maybe you missed me, maybe you hadn't. whatever's clever - mysteries are forever.
good weekend.
sat. took pictures of naked people at school. (lots of pictures) played bags with don, chris, isaac, and jeff reardon. the jessica's were there along with mark. lots of beer, lots of grilled brats, lots of fun.
then drove to alisons. passed-out out-side on the porch cause i'm a drunken monkey. jeff sat on me.
sun. woke up hung over. drove around in a jaguar. went to walker bros. ate good food. played mini-golf. isaac and alison tied. jeff lost. digested jamba juice.
drove jeff and isaac home.
today, i went to dr. got some ambien sleeping pills. time to pass out! oh yeah! finished my week-late paper finally. yay! now i just have a billion more hw assignments to catch up and all will finally be at ease in the east by the lake where the wind blows steady and keeps the sun from the ground.
it's a beautiful world and i'm listening with teeth. nin still rock. oh yes they do.
also listened to the white stripes' new song called blue orchid off of get behind me satan thirty times in the last 24 hours. needless to say, it rocks my world and blows my mind and i just want to dance on the rocks all night long, knocking my head 'round and 'round till i go nuts and see nothing but peppermint candies dancing in the sea.
Apr. 18th, 2005 @ 09:42 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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| You scored as Existentialism. Your life is guided by the concept of Existentialism: You choose the meaning and purpose of your life.
“Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”
“It is up to you to give [life] a meaning.”
--Jean-Paul Sartre
“It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the Truth.”
--Blaise Pascal
More info at Arocoun's Wikipedia User Page...
Existentialism | | 95% | Hedonism | | 75% | Justice (Fairness) | | 70% | Strong Egoism | | 60% | Utilitarianism | | 50% | Kantianism | | 50% | Nihilism | | 25% | Apathy | | 10% | Divine Command | | 0% | </td>
What philosophy do you follow? (v1.03)
created with QuizFarm.com |
Apr. 6th, 2005 @ 10:09 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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"All colors are the friends of their neighbors and the lovers of their opposites."
Marc Chagall
Apr. 4th, 2005 @ 05:38 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Hi.
Mar. 30th, 2005 @ 01:47 pm
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| » Gallery Opening In Chicago! Come out and show your support. |
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Gallery Opening In Chicago! Come out and show your support.
Columbia Exposure presents:
"A Day In The Life Of Pilsen"
Kristoffer's Cafe & Bakery
1733 S. Halsted
312.829.4150
www.kristofferscafe.com
Opening Reception:
February 18, 2005
6pm-8pm
Exhibition through March 18, 2005
Exhibiting Photographers:
Brenda Brammel
Stacee Droege
Aaron Gent
Jessica Harvey
Emily Hoskins
Eleanor Reardon
Samuel Rayes
Come on out everyone and show your support for Columbia's photography students! It's bound to be a good time and I'm sure the photos will be great. If you need further information, I can try and help. E-mail me at aphony@gmail.com
:Dane Deasy
Feb. 17th, 2005 @ 11:01 pm
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| » The Grey City |
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"Across the Field"
"A Long Swim"
"The Gateway to Oblivion"
and now for a little color...
"The City Beyond"
"The Unknown Shore"
"Lateral Decisions"
"The Decision To Move Can Become Scary"
Feb. 15th, 2005 @ 08:36 pm
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| » I Have Gained A Voice |
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After spending the last two weeks in a nearly comatose state, it's no wonder I have nothing to say anymore. I had a dream and that's all I've got to show for it. I haven't taken any great pictures, I haven't written anything beautiful, and I surely haven't improved my relationship with my guitar. So what's it all about?
I've spent a lot of time with Alison, which has been great. I've seen a lot of great movies and some that suck. I've heard a lot of great music (much of which I've never heard before). I have also smoked a lot of cigarettes and wasted a lot of money.
What would I like?
That's a complex question that I don't quite feel in the position to answer these days. I want to feel rewarded. I want to feel accomplished. I want to go to bed each night at 11pm and actually feel tired. I want to look forward to an exciting new day, every day. I want to feel stimulated in an intellectual way. I want to write songs and sing them in smoky bars where no one wants to hear them. I want to make the world look at what I see and appreciate my perspective.
In some way, don't we all want to be noticed? I find it hard to imagine a soul out there who wants to fade into obscurity. We have the ones we love and they have us. When that is gone we fade into the depths of an irreversable depression that can only end with death. Thankfully, I still have some love.
I know there are those out there whom I want to see these words and think about me and what I'm going through, but I'm also aware that the probability of affecting those I desire to is very slim. I want to tell them all, "Yes, I do still have passion in my life and against all your prayers I will survive. ALL IS NOT LOST!"
I'll be just fine. This icy tundra will thaw with the warming sun coming over the horizon and I will smile once more as I feel that heat running through me, giving me the energy I need. I just wonder if I should be giving something back? What am I fueling?
My purblind state is changing with celerity. I thought it was impervious to change and so I feared permanent residence in this awful quagmire of atrophy, but the springs are slowly bubbling and everything is being put into simple, tender motion.
Feb. 14th, 2005 @ 03:07 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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Art is life and life is art,
So will the walls to fall
And reveal your heart.
Feb. 11th, 2005 @ 09:30 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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smite, smitten, smote.
Feb. 10th, 2005 @ 04:15 pm
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| » I Woke Up Sweating and Grinding My Teeth |
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I was at the movies with Chris Kuk, Steve Moudry, and someone else, perhaps Isaac. We went to catch up like old friends should. Afterwards, while still in the dark of the theatre I saw Brittiney. She looked up at me with wide brown eyes. We said hellos and perhaps a little reluctantly, gave each other a hug. Her baby was showing and she was glowing so she danced it around me, showing off. I smiled a lot and said how happy I was for her. She gave me a big hug, but it was prolonged longer than either of us should have allowed, but it felt like home. I could smell her hair. Our hands lingered over each other's bodies. I was shaking I was so nervous.
She had been alone at the movie theater, so I offered to give her a ride home. It appears as if Steve, Chris and Isaac had somehow left on their own. There was a blur at this point and I'm not quite sure Brittiney even really spoke to me. Was ever a word of pure truth spoken between us? I'm not sure what happened between us. I guess it will forever stay within my dreams.
But somehow Kristin appeared. She was pregnant as well. I think I may have started crying in the dream; I'm not sure, but sadness definitely came upon me. I said hello to her as well and she was surprisingly pleasant to me, but it still seemed artificial. Her parents were there and her mother smiled at me and her dad grimmaced. I ended up in their car and Kristin taunted me on the eternal ride home. My encounter with Brittiney was more soulful and rewarding, despite the small chance of probable meaninglessness. Kristin was a superficiality, a lost dream, and a new nightmare.
Feb. 7th, 2005 @ 05:37 pm
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| » the joyous life |
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shower
drive
eat
drive
hello
whiskey and pepsi
television
laugh
television
drive
read
laugh
read
laugh
stretch
type
Feb. 6th, 2005 @ 11:30 pm
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afony's journal